Sunday, 5 August 2012

white friends & oral gems


I like friends. These kinds of friends:

the Queensland ones.

the Scottish/ soul mate ones.

the Canadian ones.

the high school ones.

the forever ones.

the dreadlocked ones.

the we are so alike ones.

the very special ones.
the inexcusable ones.

the you're my other half ones.

& the great and new ones.
amongst many others.


But also these kinds of friends.



I have unashamedly watched each and every episode of friends, and I’ve loved the show for a very long time. 

I’ve had a lot of ‘just one more episode’ episodes in my life, as I've procrastinated school work, or bed time, or getting up for life. I spent almost an entire holiday raging through the seasons. I have issues.

But, there are a lot of great moments. A lot. One of my personal favourites being when Ross gets both a tan, and whitens his teeth. Take a look:



Ever since seeing this little episode for the first time, I’ve wanted to do mine. That is, whiten my teeth.

And for those who know me well, or have ever slept over at my house, or lived with me for any period of time; you’ll know that I am completely obsessed with mouth cleanliness. 

It all started with the bracers years, where my orthodontist told me, I kid you not – to brush my teeth for ten minutes at a time. And so I did, and so I still do, twice a day, plus flossing – twice a day, plus the use of mouth wash - at least once daily, and during my particularly passionate time, the weekly use of plaque disclosing tablets, which would – after dying my mouth a pretty candy apple red – show me exactly where I wasn’t brushing well enough.


(^ Some more of the episode. To distract you from the fact that I'm a little obsessed/ crazy.)

I don’t care what time of the night or early morning I get home, I have to brush my teeth, and I have to do it well. I’ve never really gotten over it.

And so, ranting, my mouth is a clean place. Sparkle happens, not going to lie. And for these reasons, my teeth are ‘naturally’ pretty white, just as they are. But this episode of friends, and my deep love for Ross, and I’ve wanted to do it for ages. 

It was 2009, and I was talking to one of my American friends. I remember it so well, her teeth that is, and the conversation (who am I? That I remember people by their teeth!?). They’re just so white. In my memory, I could see my own reflection in them. She told me about these things in America, these teeth whitening strips you can just buy in the regular store. Just a half hour a day, she told me, you don’t have them in Australia?

Not that I know of, and I vowed from that point that the next time I made it to the USA, I would buy these magic wonders and give the pearl a whirl.

And so. 400 words later, and here’s the point of this post. I bought them in the USA, they went with me to Africa, and after 14 days of consistent use, I’m done. I’ve been pretty skeptical the whole way along, but knew it had to happen. Superficial? Kind of stupid? And probably dangerous and bad for my teeth? Yes, yes, yes. But a lifelong dream and a tribute to all things Ross and hilarious? Yes and yes also.

So, here’s 14 days of super vein photobooth photos for your scrutiny and judgement. Yes they are ridiculous, but so am I. Are they whiter? Did it work? I can't decide! What do ya reckon?

this is what they look like in.
attractive no?

day 1. Don't look too close.

Day 2. Duck suit included.

Day 3.

Day 4 & heading out the door.

Day 5.

Day 6. 

Day 7. And yes I did wear the same cardigan three days in a row.

Day 8.

Day 9. Complete with lazy eye.

Day 10.

Day 11 & ready for bed.

Day 12. With exactly the same head & hand combo.

Day 13. No I'm not naked.

Aaaand finally Day 14. What do you think?

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